Get the Life You Want: The Secrets to Quick and Lasting Life Change with Neuro-Linguistic Programming

I first came across NLP through the teachings of Tony Robbins. Tony uses it a lot. I then went through extensive life coaching training and also met lots of life coaches. I quickly realized just how many of them use NLP - all the time and with great success! Although in many cases they don't necessarily say explicitly that they use NLP, but it is NLP. When I first tried NLP, specifically the Swish technique, I didn't expect much. But lo and behold, it works like a charm! I was blown away. Specifically, I had some recurring negative memories. With the Swish technique, these negative memories vanished literally within 2-3 days. That's all it took. I do still sometimes think of those things - but when I do, they seem so far away, all blurred, "small" in size, "black and white," and without any emotional charge. So then I decided to look more into NLP. I LOVED this book! I got so much value out of it! The way the book is structured: 1) First, Richard details the various NLP techniques. 2) Then, he goes on to show how to tackle various common challenges and desires, using these techniques. He groups these into three groups: a) Getting over things (e.g., getting over fear and anxiety, getting over bad memories); b) Getting through things (e.g., through habits and compulsions); c) Getting to things (e.g., getting to make more money, meet people, etc). As a side note, I'd like to comment on the "spinning" technique. Richard uses this pretty much in every section of the book. I see in the comments that some folks struggle with this idea and don't feel any "spinning." I was in the same boat. At first I did not feel any "spinning" at all and just couldn't get it. But then I got it! Richard explains (in the section about fear) that sometimes the tension gets so tight that it is not "spinning" - it's like if you screw something in very tightly. It just feels tight and stuck. In that case, he recommends trying to imagine "spinning" it one direction, e.g., clockwise, and then the other direction, - and see how it feels. Once I did that, I totally got it! Basically, if I try "spinning" the tightness of, say, where I feel the stress in one direction, it makes it feel worse, to the point of almost physical pain. But if I imagine "spinning" it in the opposite direction, then it feels so much lighter, freer, etc. Very practical. Another thing that I want to point out is that various personal growth gurus all have their own voice, so does Richard. I really like and relate to his approach: it is easy going, with humor, lighten up type of approach. He also emphasizes that it should not take long to tackle problems, he believes in quick and efficient solutions. In other words, don't get married to your problems! Move on! :) P.S.: In the recommended further reading list, Richard recommends books by Paul McKenna, another personal growth guru. I decided to check those out and was blown away. Paul McKenna's books are awesome, he is now one of my favorite authors! E.g., Change Your Life in 7 Days (I Can Make You) and his other books.

I can't believe he wrote this book. I have been listening to his cd's and watching his DVD's and trying to learn this stuff from there while I am in a full trance! I experienced it well, but only applied it to a limited number of situations/feelings. This book must be virtually every mind secret that he has produced. THIS is the way to change. Had I read this ten years ago.... Having experienced the fundamental exercise of "spinning", this book is a huge resource for me and very effective. I'm curious if the average reader will get the same experience from just reading. Remember to "double" the good feeling...then "double" them again... and again. This book is a lot of work. You can read through the book quickly, but must go back and do the exercises that apply to your life. This may be the best self help/personal improvement book ever published. Through Bandlers help I have improved my life in a million ways, some of them are: letting go of the past, no future anxiety/worry, making good movies instead of always thinking of the bad that will go wrong. LAUGHING! Dealing with grief...My Aunt passed away just last week and I was able to link up the all of the great experiences I had with her and make it a positive event instead of something I wallow in for months. Thanks Bandler!

Richard Bandler has developed a useful manual of exercises to help the reader overcome negative attitudes and behaviours. The book has three major themes (getting over it, getting through it, getting to it) which are in turn divided into the important challenges of life most people encounter at some time. Bandler weaves together several NLP-based behavioural techniques into exercises of self-hypnotherapy, or sometimes lists of tips, for the reader to practice as they attempt to deal with a personal problem or challenge. This is not a definitive book on NLP, and not all NLP methods are employed. One does not need to understand NLP to apply Bandler's approach, though it would likely help. The reader does need to have faith. The book does remind me of the approach taken by many self-help books published over the last few decades; all of which have a power-of-positive-thinking theme. Particularly (and ironically) the book "How to Get What You Want" by Raymond Hull published in the late '60s. Bandler's book, like many such self-help books, is coloured by an existentialist philosophical undertone. What sets his book apart, and I hope elevates it, is the application of the sophisticated techniques used by NLP practitioners. The book is an easy read of two hundred pages. Bandler intersperses avuncular advice between the exercises. In fact, the book could have been much shorter. Much of what Bandler has to say between the exercises is just filler; he tediously preaches common sense such as "pay your taxes" "give full attention to your wife" and so on. This is unnecessary and even grating for the mature reader. But as an exercise manual this succeeds as it guides the reader in the art of how to apply a highly-developed form of self-hypnosis to adjusting the inner self. Although the book cover promises "quick and lasting" I suggest patience and perseverance.

Un libro de gran contenido que es de gran utilidad y por supuesto escrito por el padre de la PNL

Incluye excelentes técnicas de PNL. Contiene aplicaciones sencillas pero potentes a la vida cotidiana. Fácil lectura. Lo recomiendo altamente. Una de mis mejores compras que he realizado.

"Fears always have to be replaced with sensory acuity. They also can be tackled by taking control of the feeling itself." "It's a mechanical function because you need to talk to your neurology. You need to tell it what you want it to see, what you want it to feel and whenever it shows you a picture from the past that you don't like, you need to make it an instinct to white it out and to put up a picture from your future of how you want to be." "This is because the way in which people stay in love is much like grief in the sense that what you associate with and what you disassociate from determines how you'll move in the future." "Our ability to associate good feelings with things or bad feelings with things should be a conscious choice. When you redirect your own thoughts, when you decide what memories to associate with and what memories to disassociate with, when you manipulate your thoughts deliberately, it is called thinking. We are thinking beings when we think deliberately. When we let our thoughts just happen to us, we lose our personal freedom." "Taking control of what feels good is an important part of serious determination. It's what gets you through things and getting through things will make life loads better." "It is true for every big event that we organize in life. If you plan cleverly, and you plan on feeling good during the process, that will allow you to get through the challenges much more effectively." "Mental management is what produces productive human beings. Productive people decide, I'm going to spend this time doing this and I'm going to putt my full attention to it. When I come home from work, I'm going to give my full attention to my wife, and then I'm going to give my full attention to my kids, and then to my dog. Then I'm going to devote an hour to spending my full attention on something else. This is for everything from watching TV to pondering on some work issues. Then, you attend fully to talking to your wife, or sleeping, or whatever the task is." "Whenever people are so worried about themselves rather than the feelings of other people, it's easy to get nervous. I told her instead to imagine being at that party and realising that there were people all over that room that were more nervous than she was. I explained that her job was to find them and help them to feel comfortable because if she could make three other people feel comfortable and happy, her fears would disappear forever." "So that not only did he have motivation, he had a plan. The difficulty most people have getting to things is that they have no plan." "Yet, if you can take the image of what produces intense desire in you, and you move the image of you doing taxes into that place, then you will start to feel like doing them. It really is that simple. You have an incredible ability inside your head to manifest the kinds of feelings that you need when you need them." "The difference is, how do you define when to have your stress? If you're going to have it, you might as well do it sooner rather than later. Most people don't plan. Planning is everything. It's about looking into your timeline and deciding when to worry. If you must worry, you might as well do it sooner." "A propulsion system simply means attaching powerfully positive feelings to doing something and attaching powerfully negative feelings to not doing something." "For example, as you already know, you don't always do what you should do but you might do what you need to do. These words are very powerful drivers for your behaviour. When you figure out which ones work best for you, you can begin to use those ones deliberately for when you need them. You will also learn to become aware of the tone and rhythm of your inner voice which most inspires and motivates you." "If you notice the submodalities of something you feel desire for and something you want to feel desire for, move what you want to feel desire for out into the distance and pull it back up in the submodalities of what you do desire. Then you will start to feel desire towards the new activity. This is called a swish pattern." "So, who's beating you up and stopping you from getting on the machine? It must be you!" "If you don't mentally plan, then you're not mentally organized. If you're not mentally organized, then it's harder to create organization on the outside." "They over-plan things. Whenever you over-plan or under-plan you haven't really got a useful plan, so what you need to do is to be able to create a realistic plan. It is a plan that also involves you looking happy and being happy." "If you plan to have good habits, you will and if you don't, you won't." "Always ask how you can be more valuable to the world and prepare to work more effectively than ever before." "You have to decide what it is you enjoy doing. Once you know what you enjoy, you can plan how to get there and do it." "Looking back on what you've read so far, what I have presented here is a variety of ways of organizing your internal world so that you have more control over what your brain does."

Richard Bandler, le co-créateur de la PNL, nous livre dans Get the Life You Want un guide pratique pour transformer sa vie. C’est un peu comme si on avait une boîte à outils pour reprogrammer son cerveau, mais sans la notice compliquée. Ici, chaque outil est expliqué avec clarté et simplicité. Ce que j’ai adoré, c’est le ton direct de Bandler. Pas de blabla inutile, il va droit au but. Besoin de surmonter une phobie ? Hop, une technique. Marre de vos croyances limitantes ? Voilà comment les dégommer. Ce n’est pas un livre qu’on lit comme un roman ; c’est un compagnon de route à utiliser et réutiliser. Ce qui le rend unique, c’est qu’il s’adresse à tout le monde, que vous soyez déjà familier avec la PNL ou totalement novice. Et bien sûr, il y a l’humour signature de Bandler. Par moments, on a l’impression qu’il est là, assis à côté de vous, en train de balancer une blague ou une anecdote absurde pour vous faire passer un point clé. Si je devais trouver un défaut, ce serait que certaines techniques demandent un peu de pratique (et de patience) avant de donner des résultats. Mais franchement, on ne devient pas maître de son esprit du jour au lendemain, non ? En résumé, Get the Life You Want est un livre qui donne envie d’agir. Si vous êtes prêt à expérimenter, vous allez repartir avec des outils puissants pour changer votre vie. Et si ça ne marche pas du premier coup ? Eh bien, comme dirait Bandler : « Faites-le différemment, mais faites-le ! »

I should probably say that I'd read/skimmed through NLP books before, so that by the time I came across this book, I've already had some context. Having said that, I was feeling anxious about a particular thing while looking through this book, and came upon the following (effective for me!) strategy to reduce anxiety: Reversing Anxiety Exercise (Neuro-Hypnotic Repatterning) 1. Think of something that makes you feel fearful or anxious. 2. Notice which direction the anxiety spins in your body, and visualize it using red arrows that point which way it moves. 3. Imagine taking the feeling outside of your body, turning it around, changing the arrows from red to blue, and pulling it back in so the feeling spins in the opposite direction in your body. 4. Keep spinning the feeling faster and faster in the opposite direction in your body as you notice yourself feeling differently. 5. Think of something that makes you feel really comfortable. Notice which direction this feeling moves in. 6. Spin this comfortable feeling as you imagine the experience going really well and working out perfectly. 7. As you do this, look at what you can see in front of you in the present moment, what you can hear and what are all of the things in the real world that you can pay attention to. All I had to do were the first three steps, and my anxiety was gone. Guess if the anxiety was performance-related, doing all seven steps would have worked better. The book is full of hard and fast little exercises, and they really are fabulous in that you don't have to read paragraphs and paragraphs, trying to glean what it is you're supposed to be doing. It's like a little recipe book of mental tricks and mind games presented in a very user-friendly format. Highly recommended!!!